If a student shares their experiences of harassment with you (no matter what form it may take), it is important that you follow these steps:
DON’Ts
- Do not panic: The likelihood is that the student chose to disclose their experience with you because they trust you or need further support. You may not have all the answers, and that’s okay. There are specialist services that can help.
- Do not judge: The way you react to a disclosure can really make a difference in terms of the student feeling believed. If they feel judged or blamed, they are unlikely to access further support. Avoid saying things like “Were you drunk?” or “Why didn’t you say straight away?”
- Do not ask for details: Experiencing any form of harassment can be a traumatic experience. Having to talk about it in detail can be re-traumatising. Moreover, if you are the first person a student is sharing their experience with, this might have legal implications. It is best if these conversations happen once the student is being supported by specialist teams. It is okay to say: “I don’t want you to have to give me more information than I need or have to repeat yourself unnecessarily. There are specialist services that can support you and I’d be happy to help you access them”.
- Do not make promises: You may be tempted to say things such as “it will all be fine” or “if you report the incident, then action will be taken to resolve the situation”. At this stage, you are unable to confirm this, so do not make promises that you cannot keep as you risk influencing someone’s decision without knowing the extent of the situation.
- Do not tell them what to do: Somebody who has experienced any form of harassment may feel they have had power and control taken away from them. This means the most important thing is let them regain control and to respond in a way that increases their choice over what happens next. You can simply ask them what they need or want. They might not make the same decision you would; however, only they can decide what is best for them.
- Do not share further: Due to the sensitivity of the information disclosed, whenever possible it is fundamental to avoid repetition of disclosure or to share the information widely unless this is done with the consent of those who experienced the incident or to ensure they can access specialist support. Whilst you may be made aware of sensitive information regarding an incident, unless a safeguarding concern has been identified (see our Safeguarding Policy and Student Confidentiality Policy), you should always try and seek consent to share the information from the person who experienced the incident. It is their information to share. Some people may feel comfortable disclosing the information straight away, others may need time to process what it is that they have experienced before they can share that with others, including support services. Therefore, do not include the information in an email that you then share with multiple colleagues and support services. This might make you feel as if you are helping. However, you may end up causing more damage.
DOs
- Set the boundaries: It is important to set clear boundaries and expectations. Let the student know that you are not an expert in this field but that you can help them access specialist and tailored support. This will help keep both the student and you safe.
- Listen: If someone discloses an experience of harassment, just listen to what they tell you. Compassion, empathy and no judgment, can be incredibly helpful. Just taking the time to listen to someone and talk about what has happened (within the boundaries set above) can help. Remind them that no one, regardless of relationship or status, has the right to hurt them and that no matter what, it is not their fault that this occurred. Recognise their strength and courage (but without being patronising) and validate their feelings.
- Believe: No matter what the student tells you, make them feel believed. You are not there to investigate or judge.
- Take care of yourself: It’s important that you take care of yourself. It is not easy to support someone who has experienced any form of harassment. If you’ve heard something distressing or if something is troubling you, you can ask to speak to the Report + Support Team. You can also access support via our EAP service.
Next steps:
Report + Support: If you believe that a student may benefit from engagement with the Report + Support Team, you can make a referral via the Refer Someone Else form. You will be asked to share your details so that we can contact you to gather more information, if needed. However, we will always aim to contact the affected person directly and may not be able to share any information or outcome with you, unless the individual consents to it. Alternatively, you can encourage the affected person to contact us directly by completing a named form.
Report + Support offers tailored and trauma-informed support to those students who have experienced any form of harassment (see Our Areas of Work) or who may have been accused of misconduct. Student Support Advisors (SSAs) from the Report + Support Team can provide information on their reporting options so that the student can make an informed decision on what happens next. They can also explore support available, be that emotional, academic, financial, housing, practical, etc. They can act as a single point of contact and liaise with other internal and external services on behalf of the student to avoid repetition of disclosure and unnecessary re-traumatisation.
You may think that if a student shares their experience with you, you are then responsible for putting in place support, take action against the alleged perpetrator, and contact multiple services. You are not. Your responsibility is to safely signpost the student to us. We will take it from there.
N.B: Whilst Report + Support is part of our Student Wellbeing Services and can refer students to emotional support, if you have a wellbeing concern which falls outside of our areas of work, please contact Student Wellbeing Services directly, as per our Staff Guidance - Supporting Students with Mental Health Concerns.